I Learned to Live Half Alive

fool me once, shame on me
fool me twice, everyone will blame me
it's the story i was force-fed
i had no choice but to eat it
it beat me
robbed me
left me for dead
and no one came
they all walked by, but no one stopped
i played dead until i had the strength to pretend
kissing the pavement changed me
taught me
taught me i'm on my own
because all the words they spoke in love gave no comfort
my body ached
my wounds bled
and only the ground bore witness
bearing my stains, catching my tears
it stole the love i loved the most
but no more
i pulled my heart from its gentle chest
sealed the jar and left
i was never going to hurt again
nothing out 
nothing in
partial win
i learned to live without it all
save for anger
it keeps my scars company
keeps them burning with the vivid memories
memories that haunt and threaten to break the jar and rob again
i hold it close
to look but never touch
it took the love i once loved
and i learned to live half alive
half alive is half dead
part of me never left the ground