Every Word I Say Fades Out

i thought long and hard about what i wanted to say to you. but the harder i tried the less it all made sense. there were a bunch of holes that i couldnt find words to fill. a bunch of reasons that i cant make fit. and i think about how badly i want you to understand, but every sentence i start fades to black. silence settles in to stay. i think about how we got here and what i missed. and i wish i could tell you it was worth it, but right now i dont know. i wanted this to be easy, i thought it was going to be, but you never cared about listening. your only aim was to convince me of something different. and on any other day i wouldve fallen for it. but its time for your words to fade from black to white so they disappear. i wanted to let you in but for the first time i feel like i cant trust you. i get that youre hurting and maybe you didnt know i was hurting already. but ive tried to make this work and you just wont. now im fading out like my words did before.