do you ever wonder what it would be like if we saw it all as one continuous moment? if our memories never faded...it they remained so vivid that it was like the moment never passed? what if the images in our heads or the emotions in our hearts didnt shatter or disentegrate? what if every time we closed our eyes the sights, smells, sounds came rushing back and suddenly we never left? would life be better if we remembered it all, if forgetting wasnt an option? i remember how you hurt me but the hurt itself is gone. would i want that back? if we were to never forget we would have no choice but to take the worst along with the best. but with the way were designed the old we must forget to make room for the new and not everything, but enough things. our brains store fragments of our lives classifying them according to emotional response. it is unfortunate that often times pain is a stronger feeling than forgiveness and grief greater than joy. i have a catalog of moments vividly remembered and though many are wonderful more are regrettably painful. what if i could remember it all? would it tip the scales any in favor of remembering the good, the joyful, the perfect? or would the scale remain imbalanced as is, pain having more to weigh it down just as joy does? interesting questions. perhaps remembering fragments is intentional? all the details of our battered lives may be too much for our hearts to handle.
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